Have Times Changed?

I’m reading Cosmopolitan and trashy relationship books at Borders again. It brings me back 17 years, when I was beginning research for my first book, Listen with Your Heart: Seeking the Sacred in Romantic Love, which critiques the manipulative dating advice aimed at women and offers a spiritual approach to relationships instead.  The book has [...]

2010-05-14T18:12:51+00:00May 14th, 2010|Uncategorized|

To Life

Last Saturday I went to a Quaker memorial, and last night I went to a Bat Mitzvah. Although on the surface these two events might seem as different as possible, I was struck by their many similarities. First of all, I cried through both of them and needed to be passed tissue by someone sitting [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:47+00:00May 2nd, 2010|Uncategorized|

Remembering Jim Cox

I’m wanting to write some profound and moving tribute to Jim Cox or at least capture the mood of his packed memorial yesterday afternoon, where people from all parts of his life rose and shared how the joy and love he expressed every day affected them—even (or especially) when he was dying of brain cancer. [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:47+00:00April 25th, 2010|Uncategorized|

Sabbath Year

After writing the post on Focus two weeks ago, I decided to take a “sabbath year,” inspired by one Quaker meeting’s decision a few years back to abstain for a year from all activities that were not strictly necessary. It was a chance to make some space and see what was really essential. In my [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00March 28th, 2010|Uncategorized|


I don’t think of myself as a defensive person. I try to listen to criticism with an open mind, see what I can learn from it, and dismiss anything that doesn’t ring true after considering it. I said, “I try.” Twice recently I’ve found my back up. My first impulse was to analyze the poor [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00March 26th, 2010|Uncategorized|


Recently I spent time with someone who is younger than I am, had a comparable education, and now runs a large organization. Thinking about how his career path has been different than mine raises a host of conflicting feelings in me: gratitude for the richness of the life I’ve experienced so far and frustration that [...]

2010-03-19T15:27:11+00:00March 19th, 2010|Uncategorized|

A Quaker Approach to Prayer

Thanks to everyone who posted their thoughts on Quakers and Prayer on my Facebook profile. I used many of your suggestions during my talk at Church of the Redeemer, which seemed to go well. I won’t try to recount everything I said here, but I will share a few things I figured out along the [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00March 9th, 2010|Uncategorized|


Running into an old friend and her daughterLast week was a whirlwind—and not just because snow continued to blow through Philadelphia. I hopped on a plane Wednesday (a day early because of the forecast) and headed down to Durham, North Carolina, where I delivered three talks in three days, visited with several old friends, met [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00March 2nd, 2010|Uncategorized|


You all know I like to talk about books—especially good books I’m reading and books by friends. Saltwater Slavery: A Middle Passage from Africa to American Diaspora is an award-winning study of how the Atlantic slave trade worked to transform human beings into commodities. Author Stephanie Smallwood takes the records of the Royal African Company and [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00February 21st, 2010|Uncategorized|

The Science of Fear

I’ve been reading this fascinating book by Daniel Gardner called The Science of Fear: How the Culture of Fear Manipulates Your Brain. One of the things he talks about is how our brains haven’t evolved much since the days when our ancestors learned about new dangers around the campfire, even though our information systems have [...]

2019-01-29T17:55:48+00:00January 20th, 2010|Uncategorized|
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